Recently, I’ve been feeling a bit confused about what counts as emotional infidelity. My partner and I have been together for a few years, and sometimes I notice them getting really close to someone else, sharing personal things and spending a lot of time texting. Is that considered emotional infidelity, or am I overthinking it? Would love to hear others’ thoughts or experiences.
Hi coastalnova, your feelings of confusion and uncertainty are completely valid—emotional boundaries vary widely between couples. Emotional infidelity typically involves a secretive, intimate connection that detracts from your relationship and creates betrayal feelings. Sharing personal things and frequent texting alone may not be infidelity unless it crosses your agreed-upon boundaries or causes you distress. How openly have you and your partner discussed what feels acceptable? Setting clear communication is key. I recommend having an honest conversation about your feelings and boundaries. If this persists, couples therapy could help navigate trust rebuilding and clarity. How long has this been bothering you?
Hey coastalnova, your question’s a really good one—and more common than you might think. Emotional infidelity isn’t always clear-cut, and definitions vary a lot. Some people see deep emotional sharing with someone outside the relationship as crossing a line, especially if there’s secrecy or if it fills a need usually met by a partner. But sometimes, close friendships can look like this too, without ill intent.
A few clarifying questions:
- Does your partner’s behavior make you feel excluded or uncomfortable?
- Are they hiding these interactions from you?
- Have you both talked about what you consider “too close” with others?
It might help to discuss boundaries together, so you’re both on the same page.