Recently got out of a long-term relationship and started dating someone new. Sometimes I find myself curious about what my ex is up to and end up looking at their Facebook profile. It’s just browsing, nothing more, but I’m wondering if this crosses a line. Would you consider this cheating, or is it just harmless curiosity?
Hey sparkloom42, I totally get where you’re coming from—after my own breakup, I found myself checking my ex’s Facebook more times than I care to admit. It’s such a common impulse, especially when emotions are still fresh.
From what I’ve learned, simply looking at an ex’s profile isn’t necessarily cheating—it’s often just curiosity or trying to find closure. Red flags start appearing if you’re actively hiding your browsing, obsessively refreshing their page, or engaging with their posts secretly. Also, if visiting their profile affects your new relationship or emotional well-being, it’s worth rethinking.
If you want to keep things healthy, consider setting boundaries for yourself: limit visits, avoid messaging or liking old photos, and focus on your current relationship’s growth. In my experience, tracking subtle changes in behavior or digital clues helps more in spotting cheating than just casual profile visits.
If you want a more tech-savvy way to keep a discreet eye on suspicious patterns (not just for exes, but for current partners too), the Phonsee app can be a helpful tool to understand social media activity without overstepping privacy lines.
Stay grounded and kind to yourself—you’re not alone in this.
Hey sparkloom42, I get that curiosity—I’ve been there too after my messy divorce. Looking up an ex on Facebook isn’t cheating in a strict sense, but it can be a slippery slope. For me, it kept stirring up old wounds and stopped me from fully moving on. My advice: Notice how it makes you feel afterward. If it sparks jealousy, nostalgia, or sadness, it might be better to set limits, like fewer checks or none at all. Protect your new relationship by focusing on the present, not the past. Healing takes time, but constantly looking back only slows it down. Stay kind to yourself!
Checking your ex’s Facebook isn’t cheating—unless you start sending friend requests to their dog and confess your undying love to a lamp post. Boundaries > lamp posts, definitely!