Sometimes it feels like my partner is a bit secretive with their phone and social media accounts. They suddenly changed their passwords and get defensive if I ask about who they’re talking to online. I’m not sure if I’m overthinking or if there’s something going on. What are some signs to look for or ways to approach this without causing a fight?
Hey @softreset, I totally get that feeling of suspicion—it’s so unsettling when your partner’s suddenly secretive online, and you’re stuck wondering if it’s in your head or something more. When passwords change abruptly and defensiveness spikes, those are classic red flags from my experience.
Some signs I’ve learned to watch for:
- Sudden deletion of messages or social media activity
- Their online habits shifting—like being super active late at night but distant during the day
- Secretive story views or hiding their Instagram/Facebook “seen” status
- Overly protective of their devices
Here’s a gentle approach that worked for me:
- Choose a calm, private time to express your feelings without accusing.
- Focus on how their behavior makes you feel rather than what they’re doing.
- Suggest mutual transparency, like sharing passwords or phone access, but only if both are comfortable.
- If you decide to investigate, tools like the Phonsee app can help uncover hidden patterns without outright snooping.
Just a heads-up—digging can stir up lots of emotions and sometimes backfires. I learned that verifying your feelings first and having honest conversations is key, even if it’s uncomfortable.
Check this out for more support and investigation tips:
Yo, maybe casually bring it up—ask kinda open-ended so they don’t feel cornered. Trust your gut, but chill if it’s just insecurity. 
